


The Eggplant Conundrum

by TheInsaneFox



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Established Relationship, Farmer's Market AU, M/M, Meet-Cute, Multi, Mutual Pining, Threesome - M/M/M, like if you blink you'll miss it - Freeform, super brief angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-25
Updated: 2020-01-25
Packaged: 2021-02-27 13:00:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,009
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22397473
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheInsaneFox/pseuds/TheInsaneFox
Summary: If Lance had known that after spending four years of his blood, sweat, tears, and debt would pay off by him getting stuck working his family’s stand at the farmer’s market the summer after he graduated from Altea University, he never would have bothered in the first place.He was a whole degree in astronomy smarter than he was four years ago, but was selling locally grown produce to people from his hometown. Not exactly the dream job at NASA he’d always bragged he would land after graduation. He just hoped nobody he grew up with found him back home.Also, he meets two hot guys and things start to look up immensely.
Relationships: Keith/Lance/Shiro (Voltron), Keith/Shiro (Voltron)
Comments: 17
Kudos: 239





	The Eggplant Conundrum

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SailUncharted](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SailUncharted/gifts).



> Ahhh I'm so sorry this is so late!! This was my gift for Yuzu from our Secret Paladins exchange our Discord server did for the holidays. I suck because I was really struggling with this. I hope you like it!

_ Go to college, they said. It will be fun, they said. _

If Lance had known that after spending four years of his blood, sweat, tears, and debt would pay off by him getting stuck working his family’s stand at the farmer’s market the summer after he graduated from Altea University, he never would have bothered in the first place.

He was a whole degree in astronomy smarter than he was four years ago but was selling locally grown produce to people from his hometown. Not exactly the dream job at NASA he’d always bragged he would land after graduation. He just hoped nobody he grew up with found him back home.

“Lance, stop scowling. You’re scaring off the customers,” his mother tutted.

“Sorry,” Lance mumbled. He did feel a twinge of guilt for not caring more about helping out his family with their business, but he was still a touch bitter about his situation. Normally, he’d be all smiles and pretend-flirting with the bored housewives who walked by, charming them into paying way more for a head of lettuce than they had ever planned. (“Hey, it’s locally grown! You’re supporting a small family instead of a corporation!” He winked and always won over the reluctant customers).

He shielded his eyes with his hand as he glared out into the crowd. It was a summer day in Arizona, and he would be lying if he didn’t admit that he felt like he was going to melt out of his skin. He’d gotten spoiled going to college up north where the weather was mercifully cooler this time of year and was suddenly wondering if it was too late to call Pidge and ask if he could crash on her couch until he found a job that put his degree to use.

He was so engrossed in the fantasy of running away that it took him a moment to realize a voice was trying to grab his attention.   
  
“Hey! Are you listening?”

Lance blinked and shook his head apologetically. He hadn’t even realized that someone was talking to him and—oh, fuck. 

He was being glared at by the most brilliant pair of blue-violet eyes he had ever seen. Sure, they were glaring at him as if he’d just told this guy that his puppy died, but they were absolutely beautiful.

“Sorry, what were you asking?”

If possible, the guy’s glower got  _ worse _ . “I was asking how much your tomatoes are.”

“Oh! Uh, here’s a list of pricing.” Lance fumbled around for a second before procuring a small pamphlet that listed out the price of all products. He couldn’t find his usual charm and was flailing around like a smitten schoolboy. God, this guy must have thought he was such a loser.

Angry Hot Guy must have found the price satisfactory because he grunted, then reached into his wallet and handed over the appropriate number of bills.

As he walked away, Lance realized he never asked for a name and wanted to kick himself.

  
  


* * *

  
  


As it turned out, Angry Hot Guy was a frequent visitor to the farmer’s market. He was there every Saturday morning and always came by to purchase whatever Lance’s family had to offer that day. 

Every time, Lance would greet him with a dazzling smile and try to act like he was confident in his sexiness rather than the awkward guy with a crush he really was. And every time, he was met with a glare and a grunt. But he knew that he’d eventually crack and get this guy’s number.

“Okay, your total today is $40.37…” Lance paused while ringing him up, hoping he’d take the hint.

All he got was his usual grunt as Angry Hot handed him the money. 

Lance felt a little defeated. It had been weeks and he still didn’t even have a name for the guy he was pining over. He was starting to think it was hopeless.

The following week, Angry Hot didn’t show up. Lance tried to hide his disappointment, but his sister Veronica didn’t miss it and kept elbowing him every time she’d catch him glowering at the crowd like every single person out there had personally offended him.

“Cheer up, he’ll come back. Maybe.”

“Shut up,” Lance whined. Most days he really loved his sister. Today was one where he wanted to strangle her instead.

They were just closing up for the day and beginning to break down the tent. Lance was trying his hardest to act as if he wasn’t miserable with disappointment, but he knew he was failing very hard at it. His family noticed and he didn’t miss the whispers coming from his mom as she shook her head sadly at him.

He suddenly heard shouting and was surprised when he looked up to see someone running towards them, arms flailing and begging them not to leave just yet.

It wasn’t Angry Hot, but this guy was equally as gorgeous. Lance hoped his mouth wasn’t hanging open as the guy leaned over his knees and panted, sputtering a thousand apologies because he knew they were closing but he really desperately needed to buy a few things before they left.

Lance was too distracted by how hot and  _ huge _ the guy was. He was tall, taller than Lance, which was a feat in and of itself. But he was built from pure muscle with biceps that bulged and threatened to rip the sleeves in his tight black t-shirt. And if the outline that was showing through his pants was any indication, he was equally huge in every other respect, as well.

Veronica winked and nudged Lance towards the stranger. He nodded and just hoped that he wasn’t drooling or anything equally embarrassing.

“How can I help you?” Lance asked.

“Oh thank God,” Big Hot breathed out a sigh of relief. “My restaurant is almost out of vegetables and we’re about to start prepping for the dinner rush.”

  
  
_ A restaurant, huh? _ Somehow the idea of this buff guy running a restaurant didn’t compute in Lance’s brain, but he decided not to question it. 

Big Hot held out a piece of paper for Lance, which he took without a thought. “That’s the list of everything my chef says he needs.” 

Lance glanced over it briefly and nodded. “Yeah, we should have all of this. Let me get it all together for you.”

  
  
The smile Big Hot flashed him was so dazzling Lance didn’t know how it didn’t knock him over. Gray eyes shone with genuine gratitude he couldn’t help but notice a cute flush that covered his face, contrasting the pink scar that covered the bridge of Big Hot’s nose. If ‘cute’ could be used to describe such a huge guy, it somehow worked for him. 

It didn’t help when Big Hot picked up an eggplant and winked at him. Lance was pretty sure his own dick had betrayed him and was obviously hard by the time everything was ready to go.

By the time Lance had helped him gather everything and rang him out, he had almost forgotten about Angry Hot. But by some weird twist of faith, Angry Hot suddenly appeared and started grabbing bags for Big Hot as they were leaving. The two seemed to know each other and fell into a familiar rhythm as they walked away, leaving Lance both surprised and disappointed as he suddenly realized he’d never had a chance with either of them.

  
  


* * *

  
  


For several weeks after, Lance outright refused to work at the farmer’s market with his family. His mother eventually gave up, but he didn’t miss the knowing looks Veronica was giving him. 

The compromise ended up being that Lance got stuck babysitting his nieces and nephews for the day, but he decided it was better trying to wrangle the wild children like the herd of cats they were than it was to face the possibility of seeing Angry and Big together at the market.

His luck did run out eventually, though. Veronica came into the kitchen one morning and announced she was too sick to work and wouldn’t be going that day. Lance tried to protest, pointing out that she had a full face of makeup and was just trying to go meet up with her girlfriend Axca instead, but his mother yelled at him that he’d played hooky long enough and it was Veronica’s turn to take a Saturday off.

And that was how he found himself back at the farmer’s market, hoping to god no more hotties came into the tent and left him with a bruised ego.

Thankfully, his mother took pity on him and let him take a break to wander a bit. He had never explored the market before, so it was nice to wander around like a customer for once, without the weight of responsibility hanging over his head. He got to browse the locally made goods, and even found a place that made amazing breakfast burritos. And the best part was, not a single vegetable could be found in it.

He eventually found himself on a side street that seemed much quieter than the main strip of the market. There were still a few vendor stands there, but mostly the people seemed to be milling in and out of the shops that dotted the narrow street.

There was what looked to be a small cafe that was full of people. The weather was unusually mild that day, so Lance figured he may as well enjoy lunch on a patio before he had to get back to help his parents.

As he walked inside and asked to be seated, he was shocked to see Angry Hot staring back at him from the host stand.

“Oh, uh, hi,” Lance stammered. He forgot how to speak, and just stood there with a face that had to resemble a shocked goldfish.

“Hi,” Angry replied. “I didn’t know you know where this place is.”

“I don’t?” Lance blinked. “I was just walking around and thought this place looked like a nice lunch spot. You work here?”

Angry rolled his eyes and jerked his head signaling Lance to follow him. “Co-owner. Our hostess called in sick so I’m covering for her.”

“Oh.” Lance didn’t know what else to say.

Angry sat him down in a corner table on the patio and promised his server would be right with him. Lance wanted to ask his name but lost the courage by the time he’d turned and walked away.

He’d just received his order when a familiar voice said, “Hey! I was wondering when I’d see you again!”

To his surprise, Big Hot was standing in front of him, grinning like he was seeing a friend for the first time in ages. “Uh, hi?”

Big let out a wholehearted laugh. “Hey there. I hadn’t seen you at the market for a few weeks. I was worried something might have happened.”

Lance cocked his head in curiosity. They didn’t even know each other’s names and yet Big was worried about him. He couldn’t tell if this guy was really that nice or was like this with everyone.

Big smiled then as he scratched the back of his head with a metal prosthetic Lance hadn’t even noticed before. “How do you like the food? I just hired a new chef and so far everyone seems to love him.”

“Hired?” Lance blinked. Things were clicking into place but just to be sure. “Are you one of the co-owners?”

“I see you’ve been talking with Keith,” Big replied.

Ah, so Angry was actually named Keith. The name suited him somehow.

Big held out his hand then. “Guess I should actually introduce myself. My name is Shiro. You’ve met my partner, Keith. Sorry if he was rude, he’s actually a great guy, just awkward with new people.”

Finally, he had names for Big and Angry. Shiro and Keith. He could get used to that.

“I’m Lance,” he finally replied, reaching out and grasping Shiro’s offered hand. “Nice to officially meet you.”

“Likewise. Hey, what are you doing later?”

_ That _ threw Lance for a loop. “Uh, nothing, I think. Why?”

“Because Keith and I were are going to grab a drink after work and would love for you to join us.”

“Does Keith actually want that?”

Shiro barked out a sharp laugh. “Yes, I promise he does.”

Lance nodded, albeit skeptically. “Sure. What time?”

“Eight?”

“Perfect.”

Shiro walked away after that to attend his other customers and Lance couldn’t help but wonder what he had just gotten himself into.

* * *

  
  
  


They ended up meeting at a small bar not far from Keith and Shiro’s restaurant. The rest of the day had gone painfully slow, with Lance dodging embarrassing questions from his parents when he said that he had plans later and would figure out a way to get home without them. He supposed he should just be happy Veronica wasn’t there to tease him. Because in his life three things were certain: death, taxes, and his sister’s innate talent at tormenting him until he wished for a hole to open up in the Earth and swallow him.

He wasn’t surprised to see that both Shiro and Keith were already waiting for him when he arrived, tucked away in a corner booth. Shiro grinned and waved at him as soon as Lance walked through the door, and Keith simply nodded and gave him a subtle hand gesture that could maybe be considered a wave if you were to squint really hard.

Fighting off a wave of anxiety, Lance marched forward and sat down on the side across from them. He tried to act cool and like he wasn’t a bundle of nerves at the moment. Shit, he was getting drinks with the two hottest people he’d ever laid eyes on—even if he had been crushing on them for weeks before actually finding out their names.

“How are you?” Shiro broke the silence, offering a comforting smile and an opening for small talk to keep the mood calm. 

“Oh, uh fine. Nothing exciting since I saw you. What about you two?”

Keith hummed an unintelligible response but Shiro immediately launched into a whole breakdown of everything that happened at the restaurant after Lance left. Lance nodded as Shiro spoke, most of what he was saying going over his head, but he was relieved when the waitress returned with his beer. He hadn’t realized just how fidgety he was until the beer was in his hand and he had something to busy himself with.

Between the alcohol and as he relaxed into the conversation with Keith and Shiro, his nerves finally calmed down. The three of them immediately fell into a pattern that felt as if they’d been friends for years. And by the end of the night, Lance found himself wishing for more time with them. Shiro was taking care of the bill (at his insistence), so Lance began to scramble for an excuse not to end the night. He wanted to suggest they go on a walk, go watch a movie—anything that meant they were done.

Before he could do that, however, Keith suggested his own idea. “I know this might be pretty forward but, uh, do you maybe want to come back to our place for a nightcap?”

Lance blinked, unsure he had heard Keith correctly. So naturally, he said the first intelligent thing that popped into his head. “What?”

Keith blushed and looked away, and Lance had the suspicion that this was just as awkward for him as it was for Lance. “Sorry, guess I misread the whole situation.”

Lance looked from Keith to Shiro, and back to Keith again. His brain scrambled to come up with an answer, and all he got was the memory of Shiro holding an eggplant and winking at him. He could only hope that was a vision of what was to come later that night.

This did nothing to assuage Lance’s confusion. He was about to tell Keith that he was wrong, that Lance  _ wanted  _ to go home with him, but Shiro chose that moment to return. “Ready to go?”

Keith glanced between Shiro and Lance, suddenly looking very uncomfortable. Shiro picked up on it right away and asked, “Is everything okay?”

Keith shook his head no, but Lance apparently decided it was a good time to blurt out, “Yes, I’ll go home with you!”

The look on Shiro’s face was a mix of surprise and interest, while Keith had buried his face in his hands, grumbling something that sounded suspiciously like, “Damn it, Lance.”

Lance sighed and decided to plow ahead since he was already in deep as it were. “Keith asked me to come home with him and thought he’d misread the situation. He didn’t so I’m saying yes.”

Keith peeked out from between his fingers at that, shooting a glare Lance’s way, while Shiro grinned and said, “Sounds great!”

Lance had about two seconds to wonder what in the hell he had gotten himself into before being led out the door as he followed them home.

  
  


* * *

  
  


It turned out that Keith and Shiro lived in a very nice little house just outside of town. Lance decided right then and there that if he was about to get murdered by these two virtual strangers, then at least there were worse places to die.

He followed them through the front door into a pristine living room. The clean lines and contemporary furniture were a stark contrast to the hectic little bistro they ran, and Lance briefly wondered which one of them had decided on the decor before they both turned to face him, cutting off any train of thought he’d been on.

“So...we need to talk boundaries.” Shiro was, unsurprisingly, the one to bring this up as Keith began fidgeting. 

Lance blinked, taking a second to register what Shiro was suggesting. “Oh. OH. Uh, yeah. Let’s...talk about those.”

Shiro nodded in approval before continuing on. “I’m sure by now you’ve figured out Keith and I are together. But please don’t think that changes anything. We’ve been talking about bringing in a third and we both really liked you so—” Shiro trailed off, his face dusting a deep shade of pink.

Keith stepped in, placing a comforting hand on Shiro’s shoulder. It was so soft to how he usually behaved that it caught Lance off guard a bit. “Don’t mind Shiro, he just gets self-conscious at times like these. Let’s go sit down and talk some more.”

  
  


* * *

  
  


Lance was overwhelmed. The sensation of skin on skin was too much, his entire body an erogenous zone. He could no longer tell where Keith and Shiro ended and he began. It was too much and not enough all at once and he felt like he was burning from the inside out.

Keith was all fire and teeth, leaving behind bite marks and brief flashes of pain. Shiro was the perfect balance who then came in with gentle kisses and nuzzles to soothe the sparks left behind. It was a juxtaposition of rough and gentle that left Lance’s nerves singing.

“Fuck, Lance,” Keith groaned behind him. “Your ass is so tight.”

Lance let out a whimper as Keith reached forward and grabbed his hair, tugging his head back so that it was pressed against Keith’s shoulder. Keith noted the reaction and yanked his hair again.

“You like that?” Keith growled, using his other hand to smack Lance’s ass in time with a particularly deep thrust of his hips. Lance yelped but managed to nod as Keith demanded an answer. “Yes, yes! Fuck, yes!”

Shiro chuckled from somewhere below him, and Lance was vaguely aware of the feeling of his cock being tugged on. He wasn’t even sure anymore what was happening between one partner and the next. He felt like he’d be flayed open and every inch of his body was on fire. 

“Don’t break him, baby. We like him, remember?”

Keith snarled something incomprehensible but leaned forward over Lance’s shoulder to meet Shiro in a kiss that left Lance squirming between them. He didn’t think he was jealous, but Shiro must have picked up on something. As Keith pulled back to bite down on Lance’s shoulder, Shiro rose up on his knees to seal Lance’s lips in a kiss. 

Lance felt Shiro’s tongue lick into him before he pulled away. Lance whined and Shiro laughed as he nuzzled into Lance’s cheek. “Shit, you’re cute.”

“‘M getting close,” Keith warned and Shiro pulled away so he could drop back down on all fours and take Lance’s cock in his mouth. 

It was all too much. He couldn’t decide if he should focus on the mouth that was skillfully sucking his dick like it was his last meal, or the cock splitting him apart from behind. He wanted to scream, or cry, or come, but his body couldn’t decide which one to do first.

Keith’s hips stuttered suddenly and with a grunt, came deep inside Lance. Shiro continued to suck and lap at his cock, and before he realized it, he was coming with a loud cry.

Shiro lapped at his head and worked him through his orgasm, only stopping after Lance started squirming and frantically whispering, “Too much!”

Lance collapsed backward as soon as Shiro let go and was surprised when Keith caught him. “Easy,” Keith murmured, lowering Lance down on the bed so that he was lying down on a soft pillow. “I’ve got you.”

“Wait, Shiro hasn’t come,” Lance started to sit up, but realized that Keith was already taking care of it. He pushed Shiro back on the bed and lowered himself on Shiro’s cock, riding it like it was something he did every day of his life. Apparently he’d prepped himself before the date, but Lance was too tired to think very hard on it.

Watching Shiro fuck into Keith made his dick twitch again in interest, but Lance exhaustion was tugging deep in his veins. He would keep in mind for next time.

_ Assuming there is a next time… _

Shiro’s gasp as he came brought Lance’s attention back to the present. Keith continued to ride him through it, sushing Shiro as he babbled nonsense. There was something oddly romantic about it, and it tugged a bit at Lance’s heart. They worked together with such practiced ease, circling each other’s orbits in a way that only happened after years together. Lance just hoped he could find something like that someday.

Keith rolled off Shiro and disappeared into the bathroom before returning with several wet clothes. He threw one at Lance and he tried not to flush as he wiped multiple loads of come from his body. 

“How are you feeling?” Shiro asked, crawling across the bed towards Lance so that they were facing each other again.

“Good.” Lance grinned. “More than, actually.”

Shiro raised an eyebrow at him. “But…?”

Damn. He was much more perceptive than Lance had initially given him credit for.

“It’s nothing.” Lance hoped his voice sounded nonchalant.

“Bullshit,” Keith called from the bathroom, where he was getting the shower ready.

Lance squawked indignantly. “Hey!”

“Guys,” Shiro sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Stop. Please.”

“Sorry,” Keith and Lance said simultaneously.

“Anyway, whatever it is, we’ll figure it out.” Shiro stood up and turned, holding a hand out to Lance. “Let’s go take a shower and watch a movie.”

Lance nodded, accepting the proffered hand. “You’re not kicking me out?”

Keith barked out a laugh from the bathroom and Shiro shook his head vehemently. “Not at all. In fact, we’re hoping you’ll stick around for a while. Maybe consider another date?”

“Yeah.” Warmth spread over Lance’s entire being. “I’d love that.”

He followed Shiro into the shower but fell asleep halfway through the movie. When he woke up the next morning, there was a fresh plate of eggs and bacon waiting for him.

Maybe working for his parents hadn’t turned out to be such a bad thing, after all.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



End file.
